Bad Habits
by RainbowKitteh13
Summary: All the juciy details on our favorite soulmates' addictions!
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys whenever I finish a chapter feel free to give ideas or suggestions in case I get writer's block. Thankys!**

Rakasha Keller was having a rough time falling

asleep, because of one thing.

Her love.

Her life.

Her _damn snoring soulmate. _

If it was anyone else, she thought.

If it was anyone else she would slice there fingers straight through the middle and eat there face.

The snoring continued on. It was sorta a strange sound between a human's snore and a wild cat's animal roar that was in pace with his breathing.

A _grore_. Wow.

Keller curled her body closer to his and snuggled her face into the crook of his neck.

Only a few more hours left 'till dawn.

The prince of all shape-shifters.

Galen Drache of the First House.

Her own prince, dear goddess, was groring.

Galen shifted his head until it was in level with her's.

His loud moth next to her left ear.

The grore echoing in her ear.

His muscular arm wrapped around her, pinning her to his chest.

"Ohmmmm," he moaned in his sleep then rolled over, wrapping himself up in the blankets.

Keller wondered what he was dreaming about. Then quickly changed her mind. She stuffed him with a pillow.

**Soooooooooooooooooooooooooo? What'd you all think? Comments PWEASE! **


	2. Bed Wetting

Wow I am in such a writing mood. Anyway, please remember that this is before Ash went back to Mare.

"**What do you WANT from meeeehhh!" **

**He screamed at the tall shadows in his room, his voice went about two octaves up at the end.**

**In the entire Daybreak Mansion, Ash Redfern was probably the only one still awake. **

**After watching the entire Ring trilogy, The Grudge, and the Shining ,Ash was now covering under the blankets, hoping his Mare would come with a nightlight and a glass of warm milk.**

**Mmmmm warm milk…. He was suddenly struck by thirst.**

**With his back against the wall, a huge flashlight in hand, and a Build-A-Bear in the other the blond lamia made his way to the kitchen for a glass of warm milk. **

**Back in bed Ash laid the empty glass on the nightstand and ducked under the covers for some beauty sleep. **

**Being this gorgeous takes a lot of work, he thought. **

**And with that he closed his eyes.**

_**Da next morning…**_

"**OH MI DIOS! Lo que la chapuza es esta! No me pagan lo suficiente! Pero mi diosa esta Redfern debe ir al baño. **

**Y él va a ser el que ayudar a combatir la Apocolypse? **

**Mi dios! ( Translation: Wat the fudge is this! I'm not getting paid enough! But my goddess this Redfern needs to be potty trained. And he is going to be the one to help fight the apocolypse? My god! ) !" cried on of the Witch Maids ( or the WMs for short ;p ).**

**The poor Spanish speaking woman had pulled her magical cart into Ash's room to clean and as she was making the bed found a wet spot in the middle. "Aye caramba!"**

**Jez and Morgead next!**


	3. Morgead the Shopaholic

**Hey guys I've been having a little trouble thinking of good bad habits. So while you comment tell me your worst habit!**

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"Holy Shizz! Jez, Nilson hold my bags!", Morgead screamed at the pair as he handed over all 33 of the plastic shopping bags. At 3:00 AM Morgead Blackthorn was probably the only vampire out and awake on Black Friday. After hitting about 18 stores in 1 hour Jez was exhausted, holding only a medium cup of coffee.

"I'll go put these in the car…" Nilson gasped at her. He hadn't been this tired shopping ever since the incident. The one where he and Ash went to that mall. The mall that that person died in because he didn't get out of Ash's way fast enough. The mall that they were now banned from.

_**Flashback…**_

_Ash looked at one of the teenage guy shoppers in the perfume isle of _Abercrombie.

"_Oh my Goddess," he whispered to the bodyguard ," Nilson his butt is so big." _

_The guy turned around and glared at Ash. _

"_Excuse me?"_

"_Sorry I don't work here."_

_The stupid human slapped Ash hard across the face. Ash began breathing really heavily and then picked up the teen and stuffed him in the cart and pushed it towards the Check-Out line…._

"That guy is sooo not getting the last pair of UGGs!" Morgead pointed and screamed at the man, causing him to drop the shoebox. Every person in the room, human and supernatural creature, froze and looked at the square on the white tile floor. You didn't have to be a vampire to feel the tension in the air.

Then they attacked. It was an angry mob of moms, teens, and a few gay men that were after the pair of boots. Except Morgead was faster. The moment that little tan box made contact with the department store floor, Morgead launched his way past a an elderly grandma in front them and ninja rolled himself neatly next to his prize.

But then an average 30 year-old mom grabbed him by his sexy Levis jeans and yelled at her teen daughter, "QUICK I GOT HIS PANTS GRAB DA BOX!" Before she could even lay a hand on the vamp one of the gleeful men in the crowd shoved the chick to the floor and tried to tackle him down. Luckly Morgead dodged him and started running. He half turned and roared at Jez through the uproar of the mob behind him. "LET'S GOOOO!" She broke into a run and caught up with him. Behind them a salesclerk was yelling.

"SIR YOU HAVEN'T PAID FOR THAT YET!"

Morgead turned around and snarled at him.

"IZ MINE !" Jez could have sworn she saw foam coming out his mouth. To her surprise he handled the situation the Ash way. He simply pick up the dude up, stuffed him in the shoebox and walked away. Jez caught up to him again. Morgead wrapped on arm around her. "Sooo we headed to Hot Topic next, right?"

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**Ok so basically Morgead is addicted to shopping, but I mean who isn't?**


	4. Oh my Fuckin god it's dark

**DON'T READ THIS! DON'T READ THIS!**

**Ok if you are reading this I wanted to try reverse psychology and see if it would actually work. It's like when someone says "Don't think of Ash Redfern and how hot he is!" Yeah, even if your one of the 77% who didn't read this because a) it said not to or b) you just skim through most author notes you're still probably thinking of Ash and how hot he is. So tell me in the comments if you actually did read this AN because **_**I KNOW MOST PEOPLE READ THE WORDS THEY ARE IN CAPS, BOLDED, UNDERLINED, OR IN ITALICS! **_

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Quinn slid into bed next to Rashel.

"Eww, Quinn, did you brush your teeth yet?"

"Uhhhh Ummmm IIIIIIII Errrrr Hmmm whhhhhaaa-"

"Did you?" her tone as cutting as her green eyes.

"No, 'mam," he said quickly.

"Quinn! I am not sleeping with you until you brush your teeth!"

"And what exactly do you mean by "sleeping".

Rashel rolled on top of him and tapped his chest with a brow nail polished finger. "It means that I, Rashel Marie Jordan, will not stay with you in this bed until you _brush your teeth_." With that she got off the bed and crossed her arms. The seconds ticked by. Quinn, who couldn't hold it in, cracked a laugh under pressure of his soul mates glare. She smiled sweetly at him and just as he thought she was coming back to bed, she grabbed a pillow and whipped their blanket away revealing his Scooby-Doo footed pajamas.

"Hey!" he shouted as she walked away.

Rashel turned to stick her out before closing the door.

The grumpy and now cold Quinn turned off the lights, curled up into a ball, and glared at one of the pillows that was lucky enough to avoid the angry wrath of the Cat.

A long shadow from outside stretched into the room. The shadow of a person. He jumped for the lamp on the nightstand. The shadow thing disappeared, but he thought he heard a giggle. He whimperd.

A book tipped off it's shelf with a clap of sound. He yelped out loud and scrambled to click on the lights. Damn book, he cussed as he turned off the lights again and laid on his back.

But he couldn't sleep.

"Because Someone is WATCHING MEH!" his voice raised to scream. From out of nowhere he pulled out a flashlight and waved it around the room. The beam of light found nothing so he slid it off and tucked it under his armpit. Quinn closed his eyes and pretended to fall asleep then would sit up and start swinging his flashlight. Sadly, he was doing this for at least 8 hours.

On the 78th round the little gold circle paled, twitched, and gave out for good. With his weapon and shield down, he was unprotected. "WHHHYY!" he shouted at the empty room.

But someone in the room responded. Or so Quinn thought.

"_Quinnnn…"_

He bolted up and screamed like Poppy when she was caught smoking Smarties. (

"_Quinn, Quinn…Quinn I love you.." _the voice drifted away.

"Uhhhm Rashel?"

"_No Quinn.."_

"Dove?" he asked incredulously.

Before the voice could reply half of the circle busted into the room, including Rashel with some creative swears.

"Holy F*^%ing S#t, Quinn! You loud mouth b%$h!"

Quinn bust into tears of relief at sight of Rashel and pulled her into his arms. The others let them have their moment and walked out.

"Mmmwww nnuua and the voices hhhh and and the shadows-"

Rashel stopped him and tucked him into bed before cuddling into his chest. "You're sooo paranoid Quinn," she whispered, then kissed his mouth.

From the corner of the room, hidden in the shadows, a teen Night World fan giggled, picked up her copy of The Chosen from off the floor, and whispered," _I love you, Quinn…"_


	5. Because Thea's Cupcakes Are Eric's Drug

**Merry Christmas, New Year's, Hanukah, Kwanza, and whatever the hell you wanna celebrate.**

Eric walked into the kitchen and wrapped his arms around the busy Thea, who was frosting nude cupcake tops for the party.

" Mmm, Eric, I gotta get these done in time for the party." she mumbled through his warm arms.

He looked down at her and put his hands to his heart, trying to do what Quinn showed him.

"Wh-wh uhh nea nea why?" he fake cried out the last word. Thea smacked him away.

"Really Eric, I gotta finish these before-"

Suddenly, a wind blown Gillian busted into the room looking as though she had just gotten in the way of Delos and a new episode of Jersey Shore. (**Personally I think that that Snookie thing looks like an over-sized sweet potato)**

"Thea, me and Poppy were mixing some herbs and stuff…and, uh hehehe…yeah it went BLOOSH!" she made jazz hands just for the sake of exaggeration.

"Oh my god is Poppy okay?"

"Hmm good question…"

The two witches ran out in search of there crazy copper-haired vampy friend.

That left Eric alone. With a tray of cupcakes. And no parental guidance whatsoever. He turned and stared at them with a hungry gaze that would make people mistake him for a cannibal. Unconsciously, one of his hands reached torward the tray and scooped one up. He giggled and rocked the little baby cake in his arms. Fangs were practically protruding out of Eric's mouth and his mouth was half a centimeter away from the frosting when he heard Thea's voice from the hall. In his panic he stuffed the poor cupcake in his mouth and swallowed without bothering to chew. He could feel the small lump traveling down his throat and stick to his chest. At least the evidence was gone.

Thea's footfalls were becoming more distinct.

But then Hannah intersected her. "Hey Thea, Blaise is on the phone." Eric heard the soft pats of her flats stopped and turn away. His thoughts returned to his little sprinkled covered babies. Hmm cupcake swallowing…maybe that's my new addiction. He grabbed the tray and quickly pressed himself against the wall. Cautiously he pulled a chocolate one with red frosting out and popped it straight down his throat. His mouth tingled and he giggled again. Dang, he thought, this is hard-core! Again he swallowed the cupcakes until there were no more left in the tray.

NOOO ERIC NEEDS MORE! Viciously Eric snatched up two more trays full and emptied them into his mouth, five at a time. And then there were no more. He breathed heavily like Kristen Stewart in Twilight and howled so loud that shifters in Zimbabwe were defend by the inhuman sound. The light bulbs on the ceiling blew up and glass shards tinkled down.

Just then Thea and Hannah and Quinn came through the door. Quinn shined a flashlight at the figure on the floor revealing an animalistic Eric crouched over now-empty trays with frosting smeared all over his mouth and an oh-shit-I'm-busted look written all over his face. Thierry and everyone else ran in to watch. Thea held out a towel and tried to coax him closer, "It's okay, Eric, Eric, shhh no ones going to hurt you. We're going to get you the help you need." Slowly he walked towards her one baby step at a time. Once he was a foot away from Thea she slapped him across the face. Hard. "That's what you get for eating all my cupcakes! I worked so hard to make them perfect!" she ranted on and on until she ran out of steam. She hugged him and the others joined in making it into a big group hug. It was sweet until Thierry pulled out the syringe and knocked the insane boy out. "Thank God it's over!"

**Yeah don't swallow cupcakes. Been there, done that. I got a stomach ache. Please stop this nonsense! Swallow your food before eating it! And yeah I realized these chapters are all about the guys so I'm doing Keller next!**


	6. Flashlights and Belly Flops

Blackout. The Circle Daybreak mansion's electricity cut off from the storm and everyone inside was thrown into the pitch black darkness.

"HOLY CRAP IT"S MOTHERF&*%$G DARK" Quinn yelled from the living room.

"Oh my god, Quinn, you're a freakin' vampire!" someone yelled.

"So are…_they_." he shiverd.

"Who?" Morgead asked.

"Them…the...the…the _Night World fans_," he whisperd as if they could hear. Thierry walked in with a flashlight to make an announcement before Quinn could pass out from fear. "Okay guys the lightning struck out the power, but don't worry because I have some of the best witches workin-"

Thea interrupted with laser beams practically shooting out of her eyes," And I'm not the best witch here? Huh? Is that what you tryin' to say, Thierry? Is it?" She got in his face. Thierry backed away clutching Hannah like a little boy.

"N-no," he cleared his throat and regained composure,

" Anyway I need all vampires and shapeshifters here so we can go to the basement and fetch som-" The werewolves and shifters in the room growled at the word "fetch".

Now poor Thierry swallowed and continued. " So basically if you can see well in the dark then come here. All witches and humans stay here," he said ignoring more of Thea's angry remarks. "Again Thierry are you calling us witches pathetic? Well are you? Just cause we don't see in the dark like a bunch of crazy glow sticks doesn't mean-" this time she was cut off by Eric who covered her mouth with his hand and dragged her back onto the couch.

Jez shook her head at them and asked," What about half-breeds?"

"Uhhh why don't you stay here and watch over the humans…" he mumbled back as he stared at David, Eric, Maggie, and Mare whose glares had him surrounded.

_****_

Galen and the other guys returned to the living room with arms full of flashlights. After handing out his stack he leaned on grumpy Keller's shoulder and handed her a flashlight. He turned on his own and started swinging it around for fun. Keller sat up straight, excited for no reason. Her eyes followed the artificial sun. Galen stared at her and flicked his wrist causing the light to fly up to the ceiling. She panicked and put her hand to her cheecks in surprise. "Oh my god Galen where'd it go?" She stood up and shifted, ready to find and protect her little light beam at whatever cost. Galen chuckled to himself as he watched Keller try to reach the beam. He stood up and swung it around the room as she tried to keep up. Everyone else watched. Suddenly a camera crew parted through.

"And here it seems that we have a wild black panther attracted to the light of a flashlight!" the anchor woman said towards the camera. She faced Morgead and shoved the microphone and him.

"Sir what do have to say about this mind-boggling phenomenon?" she inquired flirtatiously. From behind Jez was glaring at the back of her head. Before Morgead could say anything Jez stepped in and snatched the mic from the other females hand. "OMG UM I'D JUST LIKE TO MAKE A SHOUT OUT TO MY FRIENDS IN SAN FRAN!"

Poppy ran next to her and shouted, "WHOO! WHOO!"

"UMM LET'S SEE VAL, RAVEN, THISTLE, WHEREVER IN HELL PIERCE IS.." she ticked the names off her figures as Poppy started beat-boxing in the background. The ancher woman tried to take the mic back from her but Ash and James came out of nowhere and belly flopped her out of the way. The flashlight's light landed on the camera and Keller pounced on it. The camera man was knocked unconscious with a group of day breakers doing the wave around him and the video camera itself went flying. Galen, who didn't even realize he was stepping on the cord, tripped over the damn thing. The flashlight flew from his hands and landed on the balcony, facing out to the moon. The light shone outside and Keller quickly changed her course and charged after it. She leapt off the railing. Everyone started screaming "NO NO don't Do it…Awww she did it." The cat jumped over the moon. But hey, at least the electricity was working again.

**Sadly I'm like Keller. I'm attracted to the light. I'm also attracted to shiny stuff, things that sparkle, and anything covered in glitter. Anyhooo leave me a comment about who you guys think I should do next!**


	7. Smartie Smokers

**Ok so imma do Poppy then Jez then Rashel so tell me who else you want. And I'm listening to some Britney Spears right now. So you know check it out. I know she's…ummm… you know being Britney but honestly she's cool and I haven't heard anything about her in a long time so if there's any new gossip please fill me in. (I know it's sad that I'm asking you all for some new gossip instead of opening a new window and looking it up myself…I'm a very lazy person :p)**

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It was one day after Halloween and James woke up to find Poppy gone from their bed.

_Poppy?_ he sent out telepathically.

_Omigod, James shut up it's 10:00 AM! _Morgead sent back.

_Sorry. _He responded quietly.

_Damn you now I can't sleep! __Soooo whass up?_

_Poppy's missing… _he said, but the stubborn shopaholic replied with a spew of questions.

_Was she acting strange last night? Like really hyper and crazy? Could she speak? And was it English?_

_Yeah, kinda. She twitched a lot. Was she acting hyper and crazy? _he laughed _Isn't she always? But yeah now that you mention it she was breathing really heavily. And she started smacking me at random times…and she said that I was a pretty little cheeseburger man…What's going on? _He demanded.

Nothing. I-I-I'm going t sleep…uhhhmm Z Z Z whoo counting sheep here…Morgead cut off communicating.

James got his butt out of bed and was about to search for his maniac of a soulmate when he was tackled to floor by the girl herself.

"JAMIE WHAT THE FUDGE ARE YOU DOING YOU CAN'T GO OUT WITHOUT PANTS REMEMBER?" she screamed viciously at him.

James stared up at her from the cold hardware floor and spoke softly. "Poppy, love, I'm wearing pants." She bend down stroked his face once, then slapped his nose. And then she stole his pants. How she got them off he'd never know but now she was running down the halls with them. After running after her for about the next few hours he landed in the living room couch next to Morgead.

"Wh-What'd you do to her?" he panted. His companion shifted nervously. "Yeah you remember when we all went trick or treating yesterday?"

"Yes_." _he narrowed his eyes suspiciously.

"Ummm you remember that one house with the crazy old woman."

"The woman who said that she had no candy and tried to make us buy her weird amulets and spells. The one that treatend to beat Delos if he didn't stop asking for grapes?"

"James. That was Grandma Harman. And no not that insane lady the other chick next door who was giving out nothing but stupid Smarties!"

"I remember that one. Well what happened?''

"I found this article online about smoking Smarties that said if you crushed them off and smoked them it felt really intense and me and Poppy-

"It's Poppy and I-" Damon tried to say when Morgead pointed at him, "SHUT UP YOU!''

Before the lost vampire could reply Poppy manifested in front of him, shocking them all, and whipped him across the face with James's pants.

"DELANA FOR DA WIN!" she screeched at him.

Just like Poppy had, Delos, the t.v. junkie materialized into the living room and tackled her down screaming, "STELANA!"

Backing slowly away Damon ran out leaving James and Morgead trying to untangle the two vampires. They were fighting so fast and intense that they were only a ball of color pixels.

"GET THE WITCHES TO FIND A CURE!"

James roared at Morgead as he tightened his hold on Poppy. He could of sworn that her fangs were now made of sugar.

…...

Morgead ran to Thea and Gillian. Instead of asking politely swung the two over his shoulders and charged back into the living room. They took one look at Poppy and suddenly he could see the reflection of another woman behind them. As if possessed by the mysterious woman behind the two witches started for the kitchen and returned with two bottles of V8 loaded into water guns. James pinned Poppy and tied her with some bask cord he found in Rashel and Quinn's room.

Thea and Gillian leaped into the air and started firing the veggie juice all over Poppy. Like Godzilla Poppy started growling and roaring and fell backwards. Luckily James caught her and her craze was gone. She fell asleep with the sticky tomato juice all over her body and clothes.

Thea and Gillian looked over there shoulders and gasped," Oh my goddess…Hellwise! How'd you know?" Hellwise stared back at them. "Uhhh hellooo? Witch!" she pointed at herself. "Been there, done that. Had one hell of a headache when I woke up. And so will Poppy."

"When was that?'

"That day I beat Maya. Yeahhh we did some heavy celebrating afterwards."

They all stared at the dead witch awkwardly.

"Okkkay I think this is my cue to leave.." she said before going back through the Veil. They all left to go get some sleep and James carried Poppy upstairs. Little did the couple know that pictures of James's pants were floating all over Facebook.

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**There's a little hint in that last sentence. If you follow all of my stories then you should know. Whatever you do DO NOT smoke smarties and DO NOT try snorting it up because it hurts!**


	8. cHoCoLaTe

**Wow it's been like a month since I've last updated. Sorry! I got the lazys. It happens from time to time. Anyway this chapter is based on ****Asha Childly****. Guys, remember that I'll take any addiction you have no matter how weird. Craziness aside, if you're addicted to like drugs or cutting yourself or anything super harmful then I suggest that you get help, because there are groups out there that would be more then willing to help you.**

Morgead first found her in the closet stuffing her face, yet again, with a bag of mini Butterfingers. When he tried to grab away the yellow bag from Jez whipped out a stapler and stapled him to the wall.

"No one lays a finger on my butterfingers!" she growled in warning. (**It's from the commercial ) **That was before he found the carefully hidden Dove wrappers and brown smears on the bed. (which he had to convince Jez were not doo doo stains) Today Morgead was about to sweep her up when he saw her walking down the hallway. But the way Jez scurried through the hall and kept looking over her shoulder every now and then gave it away. She's up to something, Morgead's instincts told him. He hid behind the corner and watched as she did a quick glance around before walking into their room and quickly locking the door behind her. Morgead tip toed to the door and pulled out a lime green bobby pin out of his hair. Cautiously, he inserted the hair piece into the hole and wiggled it around until he hear the lock click. He pushed the handle and was prepared to destroy any piece of chocolate that dared tried to threaten his Jez with obesity or diabetes. But when he jumped into the room there was nothing wrong with the sight. He checked the closet, underneath the bed, and the bathroom. And then he noticed a silver Kiss wrapper stuck in the windowpane. Morgead opened the window and sniffed at the air. His super nose picked up the smell of the plants in the witches' garden, the artificial scent of Ash's perfume, and _chocolate._ She's here!

He turned his head to the left and saw the glint of a Twix wrapper. It and a pile of other empty plastics were inside of a…nest…on top of a… tree? A sycamore tree? A maple tree? A- okay whatever.

The obviously man-made nest was molded of nothing but bare chocolate bags and caramel. And inside the abnormal nest sat his soulmate, as perfect as always except for the streaks of melted KitKats in her hair and chunks of Milky Way stuffed in her cheeks. She turned around and saw him staring. From the front Jez looked like a cute red-headed chocolate obsessed chipmunk trying to protect her collects. And this chipmunk was scared. Jez screamed. Jez spewed out the chocolate. Then, Jez fell down and broke her crown. And the chocolate brown went tumbling after.


	9. Delos is PMSing

** Look I'm tierd of seeing Jersey Shore ****everywhere****. Some of my school friends have been either laughing at Snookie or yelling at the people that hate her. ( First of all I don't wanna see any comments like " oh how could you like that walking Mr. Potato head?" it's called an opinion for a reason) Anyway, I give props to the cast of Jersey Shore. Getting paid like a million bucks just to act like drunk junk on TV is probably one of the easiest ways to get a paycheck. Picking on them by calling them drunk idiots isn't fair either because there are quadrillions of people in the world that have the same problems. Okay let's get on with the story! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Night World…Thierry does. No, but really all credit goes to L.J. Smith who is responsible for the awesomeness. **

**Oh and there are a few special guest appearances from Timmy in this chapter. Special thanks to ****RQRGJM9311**** as usually check out her stuff when your done reading this fic**

Maggie was sitting on the couch teaching her soulmate about-

"Ewwww she's teaching Delos sex ed isn't she?"

No! Bad Timmy! Maggie was sitting on the couch teaching her soulmate about-

"Drinking and driving!"

Omigod! No! Timmy go interrupt someone else's fic!

"This fic sucks anyway! I'm sooo headed to one of RQRGJM9311's fics! At least she loves me!"No, I don't think she does. :p

Maggie was sitting on the couch teaching her soulmate about television.

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_**F-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-fFlaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaashback**_

"_Maggie, what's in that box by the bathroom?" Delos had asked. _

"_Hmmm, oh, that's the TV," she replied carelessly. He looked at her with wide eyes. With a sigh, she grabbed the remote and turned it on. _

"_See you can watch shows on it. Why don't you watch some while I get something from Mare." she told him before leaving._

Big Mistake.

_When she returned 30 minutes later, she found Delos behind the bed board and the smashed parts of half the Comcast box scattered all over the floor. _

"_Oh my goddess! Delos are you o-" she was cut off by Delos grabbing her and flinging her over his shoulder. He ran out of the room and started yelling warnings throughout the hall. _

"_Everyone get out! Circle Midnight has infiltrated the mansion! People! Let's goooo!" _

_He shoved down the alarm and busted them out of the house. _

_Around them soulmates were carrying each other out of their rooms, down the stairs, and out into the parking lot as some of Thierry's best armed spies ran in out of the deserted rooms in search of the "threat". Once outside, Delos ran her away. _

_A puzzled guard approached Thierry. _

_"Sir, we found no evidence of breech or attack." the 'shifter whispered in Thierry's ear. "What? Wait where's Delos?" he asked the crowd. _

_But by then Delos was already halfway to Canada, still running away from the devil TV._

"_Delos what threat?" Maggie asked/threatened him for the sixth time._

_He looked down at her. _

"_It was inside the TV. The Council witches…they bewitched the screen. I was watching this- what does Ash call it? Perverted or something. __Yes, well, I was watching this perverted show about a yellow square that lives in the Krustys of a Bikini Bottom. And then it changed and I heard this man telling me to buy Red Bull because it "gives you wings". For some reason I had the urge to buy it! Hunter must be trying to hypnotize the Wild Powers," he pondered on._

_"He must have trapped those poor humans inside the box! Oh and you will not believe this but at the end of Spongeboob these words appeared out of nowhere! It's obviously a trick!"_

_His soulmate just stared at him. _

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"Delos, you see the people inside the TV aren't real stuck in there. There just actors," Maggie explained.

"And the annoying things that interrupt the shows are called what?"

"Commercials!" Delos answered like a little school boy.

"Good! Now me and some of the other girls are going to shop. You can watch TV but don't destroy it, k? " she patted his head then walked out.

Delos flipped through the channels.

Jersey Shore? For the half hour he was baffled by the talking tan people. Smush? What is this language they speak? That girl attacks like a squirrel! She is obviously a shapeshifter!

Suddenly his thoughts were interrupted by a certain annoying Redfern.

(ASH)Ooooh! Hey, Delos lemme guess your watching Jersey Shore! Oh my god! Hold on I'm coming down to watch!"

(QUINN) _Thank you! Goddess, I thought Ash would never shut up 'bout his stupid new shirt! What kind of guy takes 3 hours in Hollister just to buy 1 freakin' shirt! I am so glad I let Rashel do my clothes shopping!"_

(ASH) Hey John I soo heard that! 

( QUINN) _Oh Ashley I'm sooooo sorry I hurt your feelings! Whatever can I do to fix it!_

(ASH) Whateves…

The two vamps sat down next to him. After 10 hours of pathetic pregnant 16 year olds and pimped out cars Ash and Quinn left to get some sleep, while Delos kept watching.

But then Maggie came back home. "Delos?" she said incredulously. "Why are you still up?"

"Me? Uhmmm heller! I'm Delos Redfern! DWoWW! D-Dog! God, Maggie like you just don't _understand_! And why are you still up anyway?" he spat back with his hands on his hips and one eyebrow arched up. If he grew his hair a bit longer, changed his jeans to a poodle skirt, and dye his hair blond he would have looked exactly like the evil succubus twin of Blake Lively.

Maggie slapped him and literally dragged his body upstairs, tugging him by the ankles while he clutched his precious TV with him. On his way to the kitchen for a glass of water and a cuppycake or two, Eric ran into the couple. Maggie dropped Delos on his head and he tumbled down the stairs with the flat screen still in his arm.

Eric took one look at the vampire sprawled on the floor.

"Is Delos PMSing?" he asked. Maggie looked down at him.

"Hmmm…no he's just Delos," she thought about this for a moment then grabbed her soulmate by the hair and pulled him into their room.

She pinned him to the bed with blankets before settling herself for a good night's sleep.

In the middle of the night she awoke to find Delos laying casually with an arm behind his head, watching the latest episode of the Vampire Diaries and sipping a Snapple.

"Delos, where'd you get the Snapple?" she asked.

The Wild Power looked down at his hand in suprise. "Hmmm. I don't no." he shrugged and took another sip.

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**_OUTSIDE_**

"Sir, the second Wild Power has consumed the spelled-Snapple. I repeat the second Wild Power has consumped the spelled-Snapple. Agent Anne Thimes Jilis out."

**I wasn't intending to make this into an actual story but the idea popped into my head. And yeah that actually happened to me. I'm sooooo addicted to TV. So basically my mom told me to go to bed and when she checked on me an hour later I was watching TV and drinking some Snapple. It was awkward. Btw, leave me a comment about what your top addiction is. If your too embarrassed then PM me. **


	10. Illiana Loves Her Kingcake

**So this chapter was totally ****lizzyclaire****'s idea and I give all credit to her and her amazing Louisiana kingcake information!**

**Kingcake is like a bread bowl that a Mardi Gras firework exploded in.**

**Please do check out her writing. I've read/commented most of them and it's pretty impressive. If you have any ideas for chapters feel free to tell me, because it helps me avoid writer's block! **

**Guest Appearances: True Blood.**

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"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! ILLIANA NEEDS KINGCAKE!" the blond witch's scream deafened/awoke Keller and Galen.

It had been about a week since the team had defeated the dragon and Illiana was growing restless, being coped up in the safe house. Keller found Nissa and Winnie trying to calm her down.

"NOOOO! Kingcake!" she wailed like a dying snail.

But when she found Keller leaning against the doorframe, she dropped her voice to a whisper and stared with soft innocent tear-soaked violet eyes.

" Keller, oh Keller, please! I'm craving Kingcake! This is torture! You don't know how it feels." she cried and bit her pillow in half with surprising strength. Feathers flew around them in swirls.

"Well, what am I suppose to do?" Keller told her.

"You could maybe…I don't know…go to New Orleans and buy me some?" she said slowly and gave an awkward laugh.

"You expect me to run my ass all the way to Louisiana, just to get you some cake that Nissa and Winnie could probably make?" the shapeshifter questioned, though behind Illiana, Nissa and Winnie where making oh-hell-no-we-are-not-doing-that signals.

"Yes! Please! _Please_!" she begged and crawled towards Keller's legs. Keller, who was afraid her friend would lose it and end up blue-fire bon-firing the safe house, tried to shake her off.

But then Illiana began hyperventilating. "Kingcake…Kingcake….Kingcake…" she gasped before passing out. Even in her sleep she was whispering the words, "Kingcake…Kingcake…"

Keller sighed and Galen rested his chin against her shoulder. "I guess you're going to New Orleans?" Keller growled at him before shifting and leaping out the window.

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In under an hour Keller had crossed river, climbed mountains, leaped off buildings, skipped down the Yellow Brick Road in classic sparkly red high heels, and made it to New Orleans, Louisiana. She dodged colorful floats and entered a small bakery decorated with purple, green, and gold streamers and a gigantic sign that read: **IT'S KINGCAKE TIME IN NEW ORLEANS! **

She paid for a large one and the kind, though very strange woman, wrapped it up in a box. As she walked out some random, celebrating, human, skater boy skated his way towards her on his board. Stupid Bieber-lookin' hippie, Keller thought to herself. He skated around her, holding a retro painted boom box in one hand and some of those bead necklaces in the other.

"So you new 'round here?" he asked coolly without waiting for a response.

"My names Jake. So how you likin' Mardi Gras" he said, again without waiting for a reply.

And then skater boy Jake had the nerve to drop a necklace around her neck and wrap an arm around her waist.

"So you got a boyfriend?" he asked.

Keller double slapped him across and ripped the stupid necklace off.

"No, actually I don't have a boyfriend. I have a soulmate!" she snapped at him with attitude. " And I don't even celebrate Mardi Gras!"

Everyone in the crowd, atop the floats, and even the people indoors who had somehow heard her words, gasped.

And then they got angry.

And then they tried to eat her.

Keller suddenly found herself being pelted by colorful beads. She ran at super-speed but somehow the floats managed to follow her, with every intent of running her over. When she tried to head in one direction there was a float blocking her exit, so Keller shifted to her panther form and parkoured off each float and into the air carrying the Kingcake in her mouth.

She fell, she found herself in another town and in a bar, with nothing but humans, a lost witch, a vampire, and two shapeshifters. On of the shifters ran towards Keller and picked her up off the floor.

"Oh my God, are you okay?" he asked in a southern accent.

She bared her teeth at him and replied icily. "Do I look okay?" she winced and grabbed Illiana's stupid cake.

"Okay…well, uh, my name's Sam and this is my brother Tommy." he pointed at the other shifter who was looking her up and down.

"Yeah whatever," she shoved him out of her way, when blond waitress ran excitedly to her.

"Oh my goodness, I know what you are!" she said in the same country voice. "I'm Sookie Stackhouse! You're one of the few shapeshifteh's I've met!"

Keller just stared at the blond bimbo. Then, she shook her head and walked out of the bar. Dang, southern Night People are weird, she thought.

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"Illiana, wake up! C'mon Keller has your Kingcake!"

Illiana's eyelids fluttered and she sniffed the air.

"I SMELLZ DA KINGCAKE!" she screamed awake. The girl swallowed the box and cake at the same time.

"Illiana!" they yelled at her.

"You didn't wash your hands!" Winnie shrieked. And then Illiana threw up.

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**No offense to the people of New Orleans reading this! I actually don't really hate **_True Blood_**, but yeah **_Vampire Diaries _**is a way better show. Please read ****lizzyclaire****'s great uncle's blog if you want more information on Kingcake.**


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